I am a cartoonist. This is how I see the world in my mind. This is how I see people and animals. As early as Kindergarten, almost any attempt I made at art appeared as cartoons. This tendency became more obvious when I was 7 and spent a year at McMaster Children’s Hospital for cancer treatment. To make the time pass, I would draw. Almost always cartoons. I am very thankful that the doctors saved my drawing arm, which had bone cancer in it. I am still making cartoons every day and finding unique ways to use them in my career as an artist. Cartoons bring a lot of humour and joy to life.
This article has been adapted from an original submission from Phillip McCorkell
As a childhood cancer survivor, I often think about the distinction between being “disabled” and living with a disability. Personally, I see myself as someone with a disability rather than being defined by it. My own journey involves various ailments and impairments resulting from treatments, and while some of us might use assistive devices like hearing aids, canes, prosthetics, walkers, or wheelchairs, others face invisible disabilities.
Regardless of whether a disability is visible or not, many of us encounter significant barriers and discrimination in everyday life—be it in customer service, access to information, employment, transportation, or even within natural and constructed environments. Often, these barriers stem from a lack of adherence to The Accessibility for Ontarians with Disabilities Act (AODA) of 2005. It’s important to remember that it isn’t simply about visual appearance; a brief scan doesn’t ensure adherence to the “Customer Service Standard” of the legislation.
I’ve always had an interest in public transit, so, I’ll use that as an example:
Imagine a transit operator shouting at you to “use the back door!” While it’s generally advisable for passengers to use the back door to facilitate smoother boarding, those with disabilities should have the option to use the front door if needed. Disabilities aren’t always visible, and drivers should be cautious not to judge based on the presence of assistive devices alone. After all, the devices are just tools; the person’s disability is what matters.
Our experiences with accessibility can vary widely, and I encourage you to reflect on your own encounters with barriers and challenges. If you’re not yet familiar with The Ontario Human Rights Code and The Accessibility for Ontarians with Disabilities Act, 2005, I strongly recommend taking the time to review these important pieces of legislation.
The future can be terrifying, but planning for mine gave me hope. When I got sick, I tried to take it one day at a time because I quickly learned how unpredictable life can be. However, I still planned for my future: graduate high school, go to college, become a paramedic and be happy. I never knew if I was going to achieve those things, but holding onto that picture in my mind helped me a lot.
When I was in hospital, anytime I felt like giving up I would look outside and see my future self in an ambulance, helping others. I was healthy and happy in my uniform. I would also envision myself in my future apartment, decorated the way I want it and my cat lying by the window enjoying some sun.
There have been times I thought I wasn’t going to be able to achieve my dream. But knowing how badly I wanted it to become a reality made me work that much harder. I wasn’t going to let cancer take this away from me. One of my favourite quotes is, “You want it because your future self already has it.” It gives me motivation to work hard and keep going.
Music was another thing I held on to when I was sick. Music and lyrics are like a story that can be interpreted however you want and provide an escape. One song I regularly listen to nowadays is WITHOUT YOU by NCT U. It’s about feeling alone and isolated, but it also shows that all it takes is one person to turn your life around and help you see better days. It makes me think of my friends who never left my side when I got sick and my mom who was with me 24/7.
I have a lot of good memories with my mom in the hospital. I also met some amazing people and even made some friends for life. Connecting with teens my age who went through the same thing I did and hearing their stories of survival helped me feel more at ease.
Regardless of what someone is dealing with, I think everyone has one thing they can hold on to even if they may not realize it. Maybe it’s a feeling, or a person or a small thing you do daily.
It can be hard to figure out what it is because our brain can get so filled with the stresses in life.
I think I’m now at a point where I’ve learned to enjoy my own company. I have a few solid friendships I wouldn’t trade for the world. I have good relationships with my cousins and even when I am physically alone, I don’t feel lonely.
Having cancer, and even being in remission, is such an isolating and lonely experience sometimes, but getting lost in daydreams about my future and listening to music makes me feel less lonely. I truly hope everyone has that one thing to comfort them and bring them joy, even if it’s for just 10 minutes a day. I can’t say for sure things will get easier, but I think it’s still worth it.
About myself: My name is Kayla Russell. I attend the University of Waterloo as an undergraduate student. I was diagnosed when I was 11 years old, and 2024 marks ten years cancer-free. I’ve always enjoyed writing and reading stories; I just can’t get enough of them. I didn’t always love poetry, though. I didn’t start writing until a few years ago, and one of the things I wrote about was letting go of some pent-up feelings. Yet, the reason I will always continue to love poetry is because of the way we can relate to each other through our words. This is also the reason I wrote this piece, which was to show myself how I happened to think at the time. Nevertheless, I hope it is one that can be of some comfort to you.
“Survive, they said But I’d rather stay in bed…”
Writing Process: I usually write my poems in a journal and then type them up on my computer just as a second copy or like an electronic diary, if you will. Sometimes I start writing something and then it ends up being completely different. A peaceful, cozy spot where I can curl up or sit comfortably is where I usually find myself writing. Writing is like my release. When I’m feeling sad or irritable, I write. I write to escape, or I write to find some answers. I started writing these poems to help create a safe space for myself to know that it’s okay to feel however I feel. Also to remind myself that there’s no right or incorrect way to feel about what happened to me; it’s a journey.
Survive, they said Survive, they said But I’d rather stay in bed All day long Where my pillow Sings sweet songs Of rest here But something inside me Has a little more energy Than I did yesterday So, I make my way Out of bed And stand in front of the mirror Surprisingly, I don’t look as tired But I’m worn out on the inside Something inside of me Says hide But I wipe my tears And walk away from the mirror It will be okay
Tomorrow’s another day Survive, they said For every poison that wishes to Kill me from the inside out That is not the thing that will kill me The cages of my mind with thoughts That are locked behind Bars, yelling the same thing You’re not good enough You will never survive this They were right, you probably won’t make it I am weak from the thoughts that drain the life Out of me Who is she? Who is the one who’s done with life Who is the one who doesn’t let strife Come in between her and her dreams Who will let me dream? So, I have to take the prisoners All of the emotions I’ve locked away And say It’s okay to feel But I can’t complain The comfortability from laying in a bed of fearTells me Nothing can hurt me if I pretend it’s not real I can just spiral in doubt Until I fall asleep with the pain that Lulls me away to the land of dreams When I wake up, I know what they will say Survive, they said It’s only up From here
Giants You have beautifully risen Despite all the bad That has happened Your triumph is a beanstalk Reaching new heights Tackling new giants And still growing
Am I Still Dreaming? A very scary Dream of mine Is for all My nightmares to come true Is it bad that I wish to See how strong I can be To fight off all That haunts me?
Whether it’s delivering meals to seniors or walking shelter dogs, being a peer mentor or being part of a team organizing an event, when you volunteer, you connect with others and you often see that you’re making a positive difference in their lives or in the community. So, it’s no surprise that volunteering can have both physical and mental health benefits. Research has shown that adults with disabilities or chronic health conditions who volunteer often see an improvement in their pain levels. Volunteering can also reduce stress, anxiety and depression.
The author volunteers at seniors’ residences with her dog Bentley. Such a good boy, yes, he is!
Volunteer for One Day or More – The Choice is Yours! Volunteering also provides a great opportunity to test different educational or career paths. Whether you have a job in mind, or are unsure what field interests you, volunteering allows you to look for opportunities that require various levels of commitment. It might be a one-day event, a two-week long project, twice a month for a year, or other…you have the flexibility to decide what to pursue based on your capabilities and time availability.
Add Volunteer Experience to Your Resumé If you’re also looking for paid employment, there are ways that you can use your volunteer experience to help get a job. As a volunteer, you might be on the organization’s email list where job postings are sent out. You can also develop internal workplace connections to ask about open or upcoming positions, and a recommendation. References are often required when applying for jobs, so having someone that can speak directly to skills you have demonstrated is incredibly valuable. Adding volunteer experience and the skills you have developed from it to your resumé will help with your application to other jobs!
Seek Accommodations as Needed If you have a disability and/or need accommodations, you can still volunteer! Read the volunteer posting carefully to see what you are expected to do in the role. If you need support with any of the job requirements, you can start a conversation about this when going through the application process.
It can be intimidating to bring up a need for accommodations, but if you feel passionate about a position, do not let that be a barrier. Remember that you are entitled to ask for accommodations and many community agencies that hire volunteers are eager to provide these if possible. You are the expert in this situation, so be prepared to explain what accommodations would be most beneficial to you. Remember, you do not have to disclose a diagnosis or any medical information if you don’t want to.
As you can see, while you’re helping others, there’s a lot you can get in return. So, consider getting out there to volunteer!
Need help with applying to a volunteer position? Contact your POGO School and Work Transitions Counsellor so they can help you prepare for the volunteer experience.
Written by POGO Counsellor Helen Antoniades*
*This article was adapted from the S2S Network presentation “Volunteerism: Empowering Yourself and Others” by childhood cancer survivor Payton Tenebaum. Information about this year’s S2S Network presentations is coming soon!
